A time to blog, a space to be blogged in....
The blog of John Harrison
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A time to blog, a space to be blogged in....The blog of John Harrison |
I wrote this to my Japanese colleague who had been confused about what to call me:
In Europe we usually like to be called by our given name, not our family name (surname).
I find it difficult with Japanese names too, because some of our Japanese colleagues here like to be called by their given name in the western way.
We have 3 colleagues in different teams who everyone knows by their first name, but most everyone else, including people who work closely with us is Family Name-san.
So I am never quite sure when I should call people by their first name (so I don’t unless they tell me they like that!)
I understand in Japan where family honour is highly important, it is considered dignified & respectful to refer to someone by their family’s name (which they are proud to represent & identify with).
To a European, where we are more individualistic, and tend to identify more with our own achievements than with our family's honour (maybe unless you're part of the royal family?), it can seem that someone is trying to be distant or unfriendly to refer to someone only by family name (like they’re talking to someone they don’t know).
It is like saying "you're one of the people in [such and such] family, but it's not important to me which one.". i.e. not acknowledging the person as an individual.
When I was at boarding school and in the Air Force I was called by my surname, often without title (e.g. just "Harrison" rather than "Mr Harrison" or "[Rank] Harrison" - which I wouldn't mind) and I didn't like it!
It would be normal here for even our higher managers, Human Resources & Security to address me as John, and not call me "Mr Harrison"
If I phone my bank or some government office, or some other business, then they would address me as "Mr Harrison" unless I asked them clearly and specifically to call me by my own name.
He said my explanation was clear.
Hopefully it helps someone else too :-)
posted by John 16:56
This is the blog of John Harrison (a random Kiwi?)
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